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Chico State's independent student newspaper

The Orion

The O-Face: Stepping from one-night stands to relationships

Michaelkarp.jpg
Michael Karp Photo credit: Kasey Judge

You wake up in the morning next to a person you’ve just met,
attempting to relive the events of the night before.

It is at this point that the potential relationship teeters on the edge of a cliff.

Whether it falls off or carries along its merry way may be determined by a number of things.

Here are some questions to ask before developing a one-night stand into a relationship:

How good was the sex?

Depending on how strong of a connection was built, your sexual compatibility may be the driving force behind whether you say another word to each other.

It can be difficult to build a strong emotional attachment w
ithout the time to develop feelings or really get to know the other person. In this case, the interaction is just physical.

I personally find it more difficult to pass up another opportunity for great sex.

If the relationship ends up continuing, whether it’s solely sexual or not, then there may be time for an emotional connection to develop.

Were you two comfortable with each other?

I’m not going to beat around the bush. It can be really awkward in the morning.

This awkwardness is usually taken negatively and seen as something bad. From my point of view, despite having had sex, you’re probably not compatible with each other.

This is perfectly fine.

The morning after can also feel completely natural. You could even start your days with a piping hot cup of morning sex. In this case, a significant combination of physical and emotional connection might be present.

From here, a foundation can be built for seeing each other again and to possibly progress the relationship.

Did you exchange numbers or make plans?

This part tends to be quite crucial. If you don’t have mutual friends or anything like that, you need to be able to contact each other again.

If you two already made plans to hang out, it probably means you are attracted enough to each other that you’re both willing to see where things might go.

Is one of you going to take the initiative?

At least one person needs to take the initiative and lead the relationship forward.

If both of you make moves, that’s great. But, if neither is willing to put themselves out there, then the relationship can and will go nowhere.

Someone has to say, “I really had fun with you last night. Let’s hang out again this week,” or something along those lines to push things forward.

One-night stands tend to be associated with the consumption of alcohol, and I wouldn’t be surprised if most one-night stands do involve drinking.

It must be noted that consent cannot legally be given if alcohol is consumed, so avoiding alcohol is the best route before a personal encounter.

This passionate yet fleeting engagement has become paramount to those seeking temporary physical and emotional pleasure.
It starts with meeting one another. Then it rapidly progresses to attraction, passion, connection and ultimately a bedroom of some sort.

Whether it goes beyond that point is another story.

Michael Karp can be reached at
[email protected] or @_MichaelKarp on Twitter.

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