Don’t shy away from asking parents for help

Illustration by Darian Maroney

In the two years that I’ve been at Chico State, I’ve noticed that not many people are close to their parents.

I’m fortunate to say that I am. I can tell my parents anything — even about the times that I do stuff that I’m not suppose to.

My mom and I text almost every day. She either reminds me to take my vitamins or it’s a cute, simple “Hello, I love you” text.

There are times when I talk to her over the phone and just tell her how my day went. When I’m in need of advice, I ask her and she’s always there trying to help me in the best way possible.

Just recently I’ve been having boy trouble, so I called my parents and asked what they thought about my situation. It was an awkward conversation with my dad to say the least, but he gave me the best fatherly advice that he could.

My mom also said something that stuck with me and opened my eyes.

“In a relationship, when two people like each other, they make time for one another. It can’t be one-sided. If they really like you, they’ll show it. Don’t waste your time on someone who can’t set aside time for you. You deserve better than that.”

After that talk I knew that calling them for help was a good decision. It saved me from heartbreak.

They’ve already gone through that, so they speak from experience.

Then there are the harder things to talk about, like telling them when I was sexually assaulted. I’ve kept the secret for so many years because of fear that I began to think that I would carry the secret to my grave.

But there came a moment when I couldn’t bare the burden anymore. I needed someone to be there for me and share that burden with me.

Who better to tell than my parents, the ones who brought me into this world?

I told my mom first. She hurt for me, and she couldn’t believe I hadn’t told her. She embraced me in the car and told me that I was a very strong girl for bearing that silently all these years, but that I no longer needed to go through it alone.

I never thought telling her would make me feel like I no longer had the weight of the world on my shoulders. It felt so good knowing that she knew and still loved me.

It took me several months to tell my dad. I feared what he would do. But with my mom’s encouragement, I finally told him as well.

It was at that moment that I realized that my parents really did love me unconditionally and would always be there for me no matter what.

Students might think parents don’t understand, or that they they can’t help. But it might be surprising for people to find what parents are capable of understanding.

Sometimes parents do know best.

The next time trouble arises, don’t hesitate to talk to them. Let them know how important they are, and that their advice is appreciated.

Most of all let them know they are loved. It takes less than a minute to send a text or to call them.

Daisy Dardon can be reached at [email protected] or @daisydardon on Twitter.