When one ponders Valentine’s Day, thoughts of a romantic date night, elaborate bouquets of red roses, or overpriced chocolate from Walgreens may come to mind. For some people, it might be a whirlwind of a day with overwhelming romantic gestures, and for others, it is more somber, perhaps coming out of a fresh breakup or the death of a partner. Someone might have to watch their crush go out with someone else, and someone may spend it alone in the gym.
No matter someone’s relationship status or emotions on the 14th, I have always found that some good love stories can lift my spirits and offer a new perspective on what healthy love looks like.
So without further ado, I will be diving into my top five favorite films to watch this Valentine’s Day.
I was around ten years old when I saw this unique, colorful musical set in Hollywood for the first time. However, as I have grown older, I have come to appreciate and resonate with the film’s themes and characters. Directed by Damien Chazelle, La La Land does not have the typical happy ending, with the couple driving off into the sunset. Instead, it reflects real life and the complexities of balancing one’s dreams and the person they love.
The film follows the journey of Mia, an aspiring actress played by Emma Stone, and Sebastian, a pianist who dreams to open up his own jazz club, played by Ryan Gosling. In the race to reach their own goals, they collided with each other along the way, affirming the saying “right person, wrong time.”
As a woman, I admire Mia because she chose her own path and career over someone who was not willing to take that step with her. In our society, many women feel pressured to give up their dreams to stay with a man and preserve a relationship. This can apply to a new job, moving to another place, or simply wanting to grow in life. When in reality, the right partner will support their partner’s goals, compromise when it matters, and desire to grow with them.
2.My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002)
Toula, played by Nia Vardalos, is the eldest daughter of an extremely close, tight-knit Greek family who dictated nearly all her life decisions at the ripe age of 30. Since childhood, it was drilled into her to marry a Greek man, have a big Greek family and become the perfect Greek cook and housewife. Toula went along with all this until she finally had enough and decided to take the steps to create a more fulfilling life for herself outside of working at her parents’ restaurant. She took college classes, found a job she truly enjoyed and invested in herself physically, mentally and emotionally.
Directed by Joel Zwick, Greek Wedding is one of my favorites because it highlights what it means to go against social and cultural expectations. Toula married an American man with whom she was truly in love, going against her family’s strict wishes. Instead of falling in line with judgmental, rigid ideals, she chose to spend her life with the person who made her happy, not her family.
Directed by Joe Wright, this film choice may sound cliché, as in my experience, every woman I’ve talked to loves Mr. Darcy’s yearning. Whether it is the eloquent dialogue, beautiful English countryside, or the “will-they-won’t they” between the film’s leads, Matthew Macfadyen and Keira Knightley, Pride & Prejudice deserves its spot on this list.
The “pride” aspect of the film is depicted when Mr. Darcy humbles himself and embraces positive character development to win Elizabeth’s affection. She, too, grows into a better person because of him. This is not the typical romance film where the characters just accept each other as they are in the name of true love. Instead, the period drama shows that true, healthy love comes from improving yourself so you can be a better partner instead of just accepting someone’s flaws.
I also appreciate how Mr. Darcy is a good role model character. His chivalry, transparency and respect for Elizabeth are rare traits to see in a culture where people, both women and men, are too often valued more for their bodies than their hearts.
Adapted from the beloved novel and directed by Greta Gerwig, Little Women follows the four March sisters through the transition from girlhood to womanhood, grief, love and pursuing their dreams. Featuring Florence Pugh, Saoirse Ronan, Eliza Scanlen and Emma Watson, the film shows how each woman achieved her dreams in some way, despite the difficulties of sickness, financial burden and heartbreak.
One aspect of the film that caught my attention the most is when Meg is about to be married and Jo begs her sister to run away with her and preserve their family dynamic. Jo was a proud spinster and tomboy, looking down on the idea of marriage, while Meg wanted the domestic life more than anything. In response to Jo’s request, Meg told her, “Just because my dreams are different than yours, it doesn’t mean they’re unimportant.”
Later in the film, Jo delivers a monologue emphasizing how women are worth far more than marriage. Her sentiment resonated with me because we live in a culture where singleness is viewed as something to be cured with relationship coaches, books, online dating and other ridiculous things to “fix” it, as if it is a disease. Singleness, along with the idea of a woman’s biological clock running out, being “damaged goods” if divorced, and other harmful misogynistic ideas, severely downplays women’s value, and this film tells society that this is far from the case.
50 First Dates is not the typical Adam Sandler film. In the film directed by Peter Segal, Sandler’s character, Henry, falls in love with Drew Barrymore’s character, Lucy, a woman with chronic short-term memory loss after she experienced a traumatic brain injury. Every day she repeats the same routine and forgets about it, starting over every morning.
Instead of being deterred by a mental disability, Henry makes the effort to win Lucy’s heart every single day, hence the title “50 First Dates.” He falls deeper in love with her through every date, even though the next day, he has to start all over again. This film is one of my top five because it depicts what it is like to truly care about someone. In a culture where convenience is key, 50 First Dates shows that going the extra mile for someone you love, despite the challenges, is ultimately worth it.
