Like Goldilocks with the porridge, there is a time that is “just right” to having sex with a new partner.

First Date
I’ve been asked: “How do you feel about sex on the first date?”

My response: It’s too soon.

It’s too easy, for both men and women.

Both sexes like a little challenge when it comes to sex.

An exception can be made for long dates that last more than three hours.

For example, If you meet someone at around 7 p.m., wait until 2 a.m. to go home with them. You have spent eight hours with them which gives you enough time to become comfortable with him/her to take it to the next level.

Third Date
Most women stick to this rule and I am one of them.

By the third date, you’ve had time to think and talk about sex. You can get a feel for what the person is like and determine whether you can trust them in the bedroom.

I had a partner cook for me twice, flush his dead fish down the toilet while playing Scottish bagpipes and witnessed him and his roommates dance and sing to “I believe in a thing called love” by The Darkness. It was happening after that and boy, did it.

I was comfortable with him and felt safe enough to take it to a sexual level.

Not Too Late
Some people argue that there is a thing as “too late” to start having sex.

Some people feel that five or more dates is too long to wait and argue that if it takes that long to feel comfortable with them, what would change in the bedroom?

Others argue that five or more dates really sell him/her on the idea and allows him/her to get to know the potential partner better before crossing that threshold.

The truth is, the “just right” time varies from person to person and it doesn’t matter when you have sex with a partner.

That is up to you and your partner.

Chantal Richards can be reached at [email protected] or
@ChantieRichards on Twitter