Three’s company in bed makes for triple the fun


Illustration by Emily Reising Photo credit: Emily Reising

Illustration by Emily Reising Photo credit: Emily Reising

One of the least talked about and most scandalous acts of sexual activity is the elusive threesome. Three-ways: one of the top items on most guys’ bucket lists and a highly avoided topic by most girls.

I know I’m being a little stereotypical here, but I’ve yet to meet any girls that are open to simply talking about threesomes, let alone be bold enough to participate in one.

I have never been a part of a threesome, but I’ve certainly gotten very close. I used to strongly dislike the idea of a three-way, of sharing an intimate experience with someone I care about and another person who isn’t a part of the relationship. However, as I’ve grown older I’ve started to grow more curious and more open to sexual situations, such as a threesome.

One night while I was out with a group of my friends, my best friend and I had too much to drink and we convinced ourselves that we were absolutely open to a threesome with a good guy friend of ours. After a night of three-way dancing, holding hands and ass-grabbing, the three of us trekked back to his house where my best friend and I locked ourselves in his room and giggled at what we had gotten ourselves into. Our nervous laughter masked the hidden fear of what we had silently agreed to participate in, and we realized that neither of us had the bravery or confidence to dive into a three-way with our cute friend.

The alcohol wearing off probably had something to do with the change of heart as well.

This was the closest I’ve gotten to a threesome experience, and for now I’m perfectly OK with that. I’m all for three-ways and I would never judge those who choose to participate in one.

In fact, I have a certain level of admiration for people who are comfortable enough with themselves to have the confidence to engage. It takes a lot to hop into bed with two other partners who you’re expected to please and be pleased by— it seems like a lot to keep track of.

Another major question that comes to mind when I think of threesomes is who are the type of partners you choose to partake in this endeavor with you? Personally, I think I would feel more comfortable if it were me, another girl and a guy in order to take off some of the pressure. I would also be curious to experiment with a girl perhaps.

However, I don’t think I could look at my best friend in the same way if I were to engage in a sexual act like that with her, yet I would never be open to invite a stranger in on the action. When I look at the logistics of a threesome, I’m reminded why I’ve never been involved in one. All of it seems a little too messy, complicated, awkward and confusing.

But, I do believe you should never stop exploring and experiencing new things, which absolutely includes sexually. That’s why I would never urge anyone against trying a three-way, and I’m actually quite a proponent of one of my friends trying it to report any and all details.

There is no “normal” when it comes to sex, so I don’t see an issue in trying something on the wilder side. After all, two is certainly better than one, but add another one in and that’s more the merrier.

Emma Vidak-Benjamin can be reached at features [email protected] or @gnarlyemma on Twitter.