Long distance relationships are about as much fun as just about every Ramsay Bolton scene in Game of Thrones.

After my own long distance relationship, I would rather go shopping for my own coffin than start another one. Unfortunately, after a year, I consider myself to be a bit of an expert.

Just like drawing the short straw, we don’t always strategically choose whom we connect with, even if 3,000 miles of distance make that connection a pain to cope with. Here are five tips to help push through the unpleasantness.

Have an end game

Long distance relationships are not sustainable. It’s possible to power through the misery but having an endgame is a must. Knowing what you’re working towards will help drive you and your partner to keep going. In the end, for a relationship to work, you need to be together.

Know the next time you’ll see each other

Visiting your partner is a must. Even if the distance won’t be over, it helps to know the next time you will see each other in person before you, inevitably, have to leave again.

Getting past the distance is only half the battle

Just because you’re finally back together doesn’t mean things will be perfect. Readjusting, after being apart for long periods of time, takes effort and understanding. It’s still a relationship that requires work.

Trust is key

Even though it will be hard at times, it’s important to understand that your partner’s actions are out of your control. Trusting your significant other will make the time apart less painful.

Keep busy

Leaving room in your schedule to call or FaceTiming your partner is important. That being said, keeping busy outside of that time will help you avoid rolling around in your bed sheets, wallowing in self-pity.

Long distance relationships blow and should be avoided like prostate cancer, but I know better than most how frustratingly unavoidable they can be. It’s not fun but it can be done. Good luck.

Grant Schmieding can be reached at [email protected] or on Twitter @theorion_news.