It all started with a joke.

I wasn’t sure if I was going to pull it off. This guy was standing across from me at a party. I thought he was really cute, and I wasn’t sure if he felt the same. But why would he? I’m not exactly a ten, and he totally was.

By this point in the night I had developed what I like to call “ugly confidence.”

Ugly confidence happens when my hair looks crazy, my makeup is all gone and I just have stopped caring about my appearance for the night. I no longer assume I have any chance at getting anything I want, so I just go for it.

Yeah, I know it’s not the most attractive strategy, but I swear it’s about 98 percent effective.

The only reason it works is because I’m forced to put my personality into overdrive and be totally charming.

I lower all my expectations because I am going out on a limb.

Whether it’s getting the courage to talk to a guy I find attractive or going after an internship that’s way out of my league — confidence is everything. Even if I don’t have it, I fake it until I make it.

A lot of opportunities will pass by someone that isn’t self-assured once they’ve reached young adulthood or can’t at least pretend that they are.

By the time the average freshman hits college, they have at least a year and a half to figure out what they hate about themselves and what about them makes them uniquely astounding. After that year or so is over, everything about the way they present should mean business.

It’s time to start shaping a brand, and no one wants their moniker to be “that one kid I saw eating a churro in the corner that one time.”

Coming to Chico State, I knew I wanted to lead. It was easy to get involved because this campus has many opportunities for students to help within the community and be a part of great things.

However, it was intimidating to network because I found that I was lacking the confidence to get out there and make things happen for myself.

This is when I learned to play up my personal strengths.

I’ve always known that I’m reasonably funny. I can work comedy into a number of awkward situations and it usually saves me from my inability to be serious for too long.

The ability to play up my strengths and laugh at my weaknesses has made me appear much more confident than I really am.

So when all is said and done, a feeling of irrelevance shouldn’t stop anyone from going out and trying to get the things they want in life.

Stepping up to talk to that hot guy or apply for that crazy amazing internship, means I may just get lucky.

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, and if I haven’t died from embarrassment yet, I’m sure a little more won’t hurt.

Prin Mayowa can be reached at [email protected] or @PrinSupreme on Twitter.