The O-Face: Hearing your roommates sexual romps

Photo credit: Kasey Judge

Knock, knock,

“Hey! I think Mike’s getting laid!”

I’m starting to wonder whether professionally soundproofing my room is worth the money.

In a college household, hearing your roommates having sex can be as common as dirty dishes. Even through a closed door, the grunts, moans and creaks of the bed are unmistakable.

When I was single, nothing would kill the mood like my roommates coming home after a night of drinking to realize that I was having sex. This was especially the case for the person I was spending the night with.

I was left scrambling to salvage what remained of the intimacy.

However, I have since become desensitized to my roommates hearing me and hearing my roommates. Hearing it can still bother me if I’m busy working or trying to sleep, but it’s no different to me than if they were playing loud music.

I have to admit, I’m pretty careless when it comes to being considerate of bothering mine or my girlfriend’s roommates. In the heat of the moment I think of nothing else except what I’m doing. I get absorbed into my own sexual world.

Afterwards, I definitely feel bad for all the ruckus, and I do try my best to make adjustments like standing up or moving to the floor. I’ve also thought about moving the bed away from the wall.

But I will take a stand in saying that hearing your roommates having sex is a fact of communal college living that most people can’t avoid.

Short of soundproofing all your walls, it’s very difficult to make these sounds nonexistent. Personally, I try to make sure most of the sex sounds that end up reverberating through the house are the result of what I’m doing and not another roommate.

That way, I’m participating in all the fun instead of acting as the audience.

Michael Karp can be reached at [email protected] or @_MichaelKarp on Twitter.