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Urgency to lose virginity

Julie Ramos Photo credit: Annie Paige

As a teenager I read the books and watched the chick flicks, but I never imagined how or when it would happen. In the back of my mind, I hoped losing my virginity would be romantic – euphoric even.

Flashback to 2009. It’s the morning after the biggest party of the year. My makeup’s smeared, head’s pounding, last night’s outfit is on the floor and who’s this naked guy sleeping next to me?

I lost my virginity at the age of 15. There was so much hype about giving up that precious, sacred v-card. Losing my virginity was nothing I thought it would be. A letdown really. There were no candles, no butterflies, no cuddling after – nothing.

I was a freshman and the guy was a senior in high school. The upside was that he was really hot and popular, so I felt cool and accomplished for a freshman. The downside was that I barely knew him, we were drunk and the sex wasn’t even good.In fact, I think it hurt.

According to Women’s Health Magazine in a 2013 article, the number one sexual regret women have is losing their virginity to the wrong person.

I 100 percent regret how I lost my virginity. It wasn’t because I was young or not sober, it really was with the wrong person.

Fast-forward to present day. When I reflect on losing my virginity, I still have my regrets. Sex with that senior wasn’t a blessing, but it was for sure a lesson. Since then, I’ve had sex with more partners but almost all have been people who I care about and I’ve waken up in the morning without remorse or guilt.

Having sex for the first time is a big deal – for women, men or anyone. There’s no way of knowing how it will be or if you’ll regret it in the morning.

It’s better to be sure and wait than wake up the next day thinking you shouldn’t have been hooking up when it is too late.

Take the smart route on your next post-sex morning after, avoid the walk of shame and strut the stride of pride.

Julie Ramos can be reached at [email protected] or @julie_ramoss on Twitter.

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