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Chico State's independent student newspaper

The Orion

Chico State's independent student newspaper

The Orion

Chico State's independent student newspaper

The Orion

Men, try commitment

Tara Miller
Tara Miller

Being in a serious committed relationship during college doesn’t seem fun or exciting, I know. Especially when popular wisdom dictates that college is a time to have fun and let loose before you have to start looking for the more major things in life, like a job and a wife.

But let’s be realistic. We aren’t getting any younger, and we definitely don’t always want to be stuck just hooking up.

Since entering college, I haven’t met a single guy who wants to be in a committed relationship. Maybe I’m looking in the wrong places, but every guy I’ve had feelings for has only wanted to be friends with benefits or just straight up friends. Either way, I have yet to be in an actual committed relationship with a guy during college.

dearboysAs college students, finding the time to be in a serious relationship is hard, and students may not always have the time for one.

Hooking up is fun, and I’m sure some students would be fine maintaining that lifestyle throughout college. It allows men and women more freedom for exploration, freeing them of the  restrictions that come with a serious relationship. But this nomadic lifestyle doesn’t help anyone in the long run. It’s an escape route from having to go through the pain of a breakup.

Having a committed relationship removes you from other compelling choices, but it also means you won’t have to deal with worrying about who else the girl slept with and whether she may have caught a nasty disease.

There’s no denying that having a committed relationship takes a lot of time and dedication. But when it comes down to it, having such a relationship can end up being a lot safer. It may also end up making you a lot happier in the long run.

When you go through a serious relationship that may or may not last, it allows you to gain a better understanding of the qualities you want in someone. It also allows you to gain better communication skills because you have to learn to express what is and is not working in the relationship.

I know it’s scary to be serious with someone during a period of time when you are supposed to be independent and exploring what you want and don’t want in life. It can also be a learning experience and can help you more during this phase of life.

Men, start looking at commitment more seriously. Living the hookup lifestyle isn’t going to last for much longer.

 

Tara Miller can be reached at [email protected] or @chicojournalist on Twitter.

Illustration by Liz Coffee.

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