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Sugaring can be both sweet and sour

Photo+courtesy+of+Getty+Images+by+Hill+Street+Studios+Photo+credit%3A+Hill+Street+Studios
Photo courtesy of Getty Images by Hill Street Studios Photo credit: Hill Street Studios

Photo courtesy of Getty Images by Hill Street Studios Photo credit: Hill Street Studios

Photo courtesy of Getty Images by Hill Street Studios Photo credit: Hill Street Studios

Rayanne Painter

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Money is tight for those of us in college, or for other adults trying to make their business or career goals workout. Wouldn’t it be great to have some help through the struggles?

It’s no secret that sugaring is a hot topic on social media, nowadays for this upcoming generation. For those who aren’t familiar with the term, sugaring is a type of relationship between a sugar baby, who provides attention and companionship in return for being pampered, and a sugar daddy or parent, who pampers in return for this companionship. These actions of “pampering” and “companionship” come in all forms in this type of lifestyle and relationship. A sugar parent can also be any gender or age, but typically this relationship exists between a young person and an older person with high net worth.

These relationships are often glorified by society, they are also scrutinized for being anti-feminist or patriarchal, as the sugar baby role is usually filled by a woman. But, sugaring gives a lot of power to the sugar baby in particular, as they are the ones who have control over what companionship they give and what they will receive for it. If the sugar baby doesn’t agree with the conditions that the sugar parent prefers, then it is within their right to step back and find somebody else. Plus, there is nothing wrong between two adults maintaining a consensual agreement to exchange material or financial goods for love or sex.

As a college student myself burdened by student loans, I have flirted with the possibility of finding a sugar parent through apps like Seeking Arrangements. While the thought of potentially being taken care of while I’m still in school sounds appealing, I’ve never followed through with seriously meeting anybody because sugaring is very intimidating to me personally. But that’s not to say that I would never consider looking again. If I found a sugar parent who had similar expectations as I do and made me feel at ease about sugaring, then I would definitely reconsider.

Sugaring is great for adults who feel comfortable and would benefit from it, but there is a matter of safety within the culture. Recently, this concern has come into view with the murder of Sharon Otieno, who died in a vague circumstance related to her sugar daddy. Parts of the media are blaming her for her own death, as it is thought that her decision to take part in sugaring led to her death. We don’t know much about the relationship between her and her sugar daddy, but no person deserves to be blamed for the cause of their abuse and murder.

Regardless of the controversy, this tragedy opens up a conversation that needs to be had: sugaring is gaining rapid momentum within this young adult generation. Popular influencers on Youtube are making videos about their sugar daddy experiences and women who live these lavish lifestyles are sharing their stories more often on social media. Sugaring is considered a full-time job by most people who partake and can be classified as sex work depending on the type of sugar relationship. Like any job or work, research and standards are essential before you decide to work for somebody.

While the topic of sugar daddies is humorous and light-hearted throughout media, it is increasingly serious with aspects such as internet safety and consensual boundaries on the line. I can’t say that the news of Otieno’s death didn’t scare me a bit about the culture, but overall it reminded me to be cautious if I ever decide to delve into Seeking Arrangements again. This tragic event should be used as a lesson to not only keep ourselves safe while sugaring but also to keep safe during any internet interaction.

Rayanne Painter can be reached at [email protected] or @rayphenomenon on Twitter.

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2 Comments

2 Responses to “Sugaring can be both sweet and sour”

  1. Dana on September 19th, 2018 7:03 pm

    look for sugar daddy or baby online? How about sugardaddymeetsite.com?

    [Reply]

  2. Prosecutor on September 25th, 2018 9:57 am

    “Plus, there is nothing wrong between two adults maintaining a consensual agreement to exchange material or financial goods for love or sex.”

    Sugaring is a nice term so you don’t have to face what you’re really talking about: prostitution. While you might not think its wrong, it is illegal, and you are doing a great disservice to your readers by dodging that fact.

    [Reply]

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Sugaring can be both sweet and sour