The O-Face: Dysfunctions don’t have to ruin your sex life

Maly Xiong
Maly Xiong

Have you ever experienced an OD? And no, I’m not talking about a drug overdose.

Orgasm dysfunction, or anorgasmia, is a condition in which a person cannot reach sexual climax for various psychological, physical or medical reasons. Anorgasmia is more common in women than in men, but there are cases where men experience it too.

I was skeptical of orgasm dysfunction at first, because who could live without orgasms and still enjoy their sex life? How could sex be awesome without one?

Little did I know, I had a partner who has never experienced an orgasm.

It didn’t take away from our sexual intimacy. We still have plenty of it, he still thoroughly enjoys it, and he doesn’t think it’s a chore. But I know he will probably never have that “ahhhhhh” moment.

It upset me because I felt he was missing out. But as he said, “you can’t miss something you never had.”

Another misconception about sexual dysfunction is that men who have erectile dysfunction immediately have anorgasmia.

This is simply not true.

Though the two can be connected, erectile dysfunction is more along the lines of not being able to develop or maintain an erection.

It is not uncommon for men to have ED, but it is rare for men under 50.

I also have had a partner with ED.

I was surprised when he told me and I knew he was uncomfortable with it, but again, it did not take away from our escapades in the bedroom. If anything, he knew how to please without the final act of sex.

Like men, women suffer from female sexual dysfunction, a condition which many say is not a real disease.

I believe it is. If men suffer from erectile dysfunction, there are some women who suffer from a similar disorder, and can’t find pleasure in sex.

The experience could be one filled with pain, never getting sexual release or not being able to become sexually aroused.

Women also get misconception from movies that every time they have sex, they must orgasm. This is not true.

It is not normal to orgasm each and every time. It depends how long your partner lasts, whether you reach your climax, whether you’re preoccupied with other things.

In simpler words: It’s normal.

No matter what sexual dysfunction men and women have, sex is still enjoyed through various other ways. It is not all about the act of intercourse. It can be about having a caring partner or having fun with the lead-up to climax.

Dysfunctions are common and can be helped with doctor-prescribed medication, so the condition doesn’t have to ruin your sex life.


Chantal Richards can be reached at [email protected] or @ChantieRichards on Twitter.