I think we are losing the art and ability to seduce our partners with words, wit and intellect. Yes, a nice body is fun to look at or take for a spin, but what is going to make me stay? How is this person going to communicate with me? When I am not near, how does this person keep me on the hook when I read their text or emails?

I can remember some of the emails my partner and I would send — mmm, utterly delightful and erotic. In one he wrote, “… from the gasp on your lips to the hands slowly, relentlessly massaging …” His closing to this email was asking if I felt anything. I responded that I hadn’t, but let’s face it: The above is just a snippet, and hell yeah I felt the heat in my body that comes with lustful thoughts.

My partner worked at wooing me with words for a while before I finally caved and admitted my attraction to him.

With the creation of Tinder, Snapchat and other apps that have become quick hookup apps, they make it easy to be lazy in getting what we want. One BBC historian Lucy Worsley says, “ Romance is dying out.”

The work that someone puts into getting to belly bump can also show what they think about their partner. If a person is only willing to put in a drunk text of a dick pic followed by “Are you up?”, then what are they saying the relationship is worth? There are exceptions, but if this is a norm then cut that tie, you deserve better.

There are many forms of writing that can help you close the deal. Here are a couple of ideas and styles that might send a shiver from your head to between the legs.

Sexting

Erotica can work for sexting. Sexting can be really fun, but be creative and build in some foreplay. I am always amazed at how a few heated lines of writing will get me super flustered.

Love letters

Letters are good if a person is in a long-distance relationship. I find someone else’s love letters as a starting point can be helpful, and some can be pretty eager and almost ravenous in how they describe their longing. One that was recommended to me was Franz Kafka (It can be found in Meriam Library).

Poetry

There is something to being able to say something without actually saying it. It’s like a burlesque dance with words or even E.E. Cummings dappled in sexy poetry.

Words can be said aloud or read silently in a person’s head, but what can be aroused by written words can be pretty powerful.

I have been told I need to work on my sexting. I better get to practicing.

Joann Chevaillier can be reached at [email protected] or @jmc_8284 on Twitter